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Week 07

February 15, 2020

225.0 lbs

8:09 AM – Big Mouth Coffee Roasters

… K and A in the store today… bitter cold… household up when i am… made a cassoulet, bitter green salad, chocolate mousse for Valentines day last night, H got me a set of Opinel Knives including a vegetable peeler and bread knife, with canvas pouch, for road trips, camping, etc… i check the bank account, i know we don’t have enough in checking to get through to H’s next SS check, going to need to be abstemious… forgot to bring computer glasses with me, oh well… need to do some catching up, behind on photographs and posting… not feeling great today, not sure why… Johnny Cash, In My Life, Beatles, “in my life I’ve loved them all“… beautiful love song… need to write, need to work, need to produce… something going on with my eyes, need to see the eye doctor… an hour on the phone with my sister, a trim woman with tight sweater showing off breasts, lifted and rounded, brunette, hair down to shoulder blades, pony tail tied and draped over right shoulder, the pleasures of sitting in a coffee shop and observing the movement… JC doing Solitary Man now… reading further and further into Beloved, a sad story of inhumanity to humanity, the description of being in boxes in a ditch, of rains coming, threatening to bury men in mud, a story to be expected from the horrors of war, but this is peace time during a time when human beings could be owned… sad and appalling, how things were, do many white people read this book?… a Jehovah’s Witness crew is arriving, planning what they plan, continuous presence in town, they own property, stand quietly on street corners, greetings as i pass, looking for me to enquire, i never do… an article in Scientific American on Pansychism, the second one i have seen in as many weeks, promoting a book, i wonder if i will find it in the library, Galileo’s Error, not available from the public library, will have to buy it, appears to be another book written from the philosophical point of view, a view beyond the reaches of scientific verification… thinking about cleaning out and organizing my studio, thought about my guitar which i have had since high school, sitting there waiting to be played by someone… i wonder if i will ever get it out and spend enough time with it to build up calluses and play for longer periods of time… Riding First Class On The Titanic, Nathan Lyons, i open it, turn to the first photograph, a poster of Rocky Balboa, from the first Rocky movie?, plastered over it is a hand written poster with the words from Mark 8:36 “for what shall it profit a man if he shall gain the whole world and loose his own soul?, indeed, facts don’t matter, what people believe matters… the next photograph of a hand sculpture in front of a Victorian house giving the Vulcan “live long and prosper” hand sign and then the head of an American Indian tucked under and inside, a sign of some kind, no longer in use…

February 14, 2020

225.0 lbs

9:00 AM – Big Mouth Coffee Roasters

… S___ is the name of Amy Winehouse Eyes Barista, she filled my order without my telling her what i wanted which i told her necessitated being on a first name basis… interesting thoughts about short stories this morning, wanting to build them on myths presented in a modern day context… little girl and her dad playing checkers a few tables over… feeling frustrated, struggling to get done all i want to get done… more Beloved, makes me sad, for our brutality and our willingness to be brutal again, the incredible hardships a people were forced to go through, the continued problematic place they are given in our society, the hatred… ran into W leaving, then S coming in, they often appear within minutes of each other but aren’t moving around their day together… the dogs were annoying this morning, would not settle down, had to crate Fiona for a while so i could read… S has been joined by another barista,

February 13, 2020

224.2 lbs

8:48 AM – Big Mouth Coffee Roasters

… don’t have much time, H has painting class this morning… started reading Beloved, by Toni Morrison, i am too old to be devastated by the picture it paints, but it is, so far, a sad picture of lives lived with very limited hope for a better future… the American values project continues, not too much response, doesn’t matter, it’s what i need to do…

February 12, 2020

224.2 lbs

9:11 AM – Big Mouth Coffee Roasters

… many good thoughts passing through my head, mostly about my work, going to try some pairings and combinations of photos, going to stay focused on “The Unanswered Question,” all the work deals with that, flows from it, the work should gather and be presented with that core idea at its center… writing about the American value of competition/free enterprise, really needs to be reconsidered in my humble opinion, we need a more communal approach to production and distribution, we need a more localized approach, we need Buddhist Economics, economics as if people mattered… got up late this morning, read the news instead of a book as i wait for Toni Morrison book, looking for inspiration, looking for joy… nice exchange with K as i got my coffee, complimented her t-shirt, she told the story of how she came by it, the bits and pieces we can learn about one another as we go about our daily business… New Hampshire primaries last night, Bernie and Pete duke it out for lead position, Amy leapfrogging to third place in dramatic fashion, Liz and Joe on the ropes, Bloomberg waiting in the wings… will be interesting, edge of seat nerve racking to see how it all plays out, given my thoughts about communal economy, local economy, an economy as if people mattered, Bernie might be my choice, but he needs to demonstrate he has more than the white vote, next couple of primaries will tell the story on that front, can’t really get into Pete, don’t know why, but at most i think he may be VP candidate… well, need to get going…

February 11, 2020

224.2 lbs

7:28 AM – During my walk.

… the idea that free will is experience and socially dependent… typological meditations… close to finishing my book on Pansychism, i need to write down a running list of questions, such as, how is this not a philosophy meant to give us comfort in a cosmos that has no meaning?, is an ontology required for a complete explanation of the cosmos?, is there anything about Pansychism that is required by the physical laws of the universe to operate?… these are a few… i was excited to find mention of Teilhard de Chardin as being part of the history of Pansychic philosophy… i am comforted by the idea of it, specifically, Idealist Pansychism, if true, it means we are definitely part of something larger than we can perceive, ever… another question, why is the emergence of consciousness from matter with no perceptive capabilities problematic?, is gravity a perceptive capability, any attractive or repulsive force?, does Pansychism become an anthropomorphic expression of these forces to their detriment?… i have been given a list of sources to read, i need to activate my library membership to see if i can get the books without paying for them, i will buy only the ones i want to go back to again and again…

February 10, 2020

222.0 lbs

8:11 AM – Big Mouth Coffee Roasters

… rainy day, walked with iPhone to make pictures… writer’s group with S, S, and A, was a good group, got a good critique on my obsession short story which suggests it needs more development… i read up on the Gorgon Sisters, Medusa, Stheno, Euryale… Medusa was mortal, Stheno and Euryale were not, they all had the power to turn anyone who gazed upon them to stone and were considered evil omens… images and carvings of Medusa when placed at entryways are able to ward off evil… Perseus killed Medusa, Pegasus and Chrysaor, children of her Union with Poseidon, were born from Medusa’s death… Medusa was punished by Athena when Poseidon raped her in a temple of Athena… thinking my story needs to be more deeply infused with the greek mythology… also talked about my WordPress site last night, i am very enthusiastic about the way it is developing, really looking forward to evolving it and thinking that i should start to migrate my portfolio over to it so the work is presented all of a piece… thinking about that… looking forward to getting some basic book making supplies, i have decided to use the proceeds of my photograph sale to do that… this will allow me to reconfigure and produce the accordion book more easily… also planning an overhaul of my studio so that it can function for book making and so forth… i am excited about that as i think it will set me free to produce more artists books as i have been wanting to… forward motion, forward motion… i think i will install my flattened can series on the WP site first… time to go home and make breakfast…

February 09, 2020

225.0 lbs

8:46 AM – Big Mouth Coffee Roasters

… lots of communicating this morning, J, S, email to H and J to thank for members show at CPW… light dusting of snow on the ground, might have gotten some nice pics… thinking about need to clean and organize my studio so i can more effectively work in it… getting going on J work tomorrow, yea, make some money, a little, pay for my framing costs for upcoming show… time to get going, maybe more later…

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